‘I’ve Returned After Living In The US For 28 Years’

‘My
trajectory
right
now
is
five
steps
forward,
two
steps
backwards.’

Meenakshi
Seshadri
has
always
had
the
guts
to
be
unique
among
Bollywood’s
cookie-cutter
stars.
Now
she
is
exhibiting
rare
courage
again,
leaving
behind
her
life
in
the
US
to
seek
creative
satisfaction
in
India.

Before
the
interview,

Dinesh
Raheja
jokingly
pleads
with
her
not
to
end
up
playing
mother
roles.

She
laughs
whole-heartedly,
“Arrey
baba,
I
might
soon
become
a
grandmother,
how
can
I
not
play
an
onscreen
mother?”

“I
don’t
expect
the
heroine’s
role,”
she
adds,
and
then
pragmatically
lays
out
her
plans
on
achieving
that
perfect
cinematic
balance:
“Jahan
main
bhi
khush,
janta
bhi
khush
aur
film-maker

bhi
khush
(which
pleases
me,
the
audience
and
the
film-maker).”

How
are
you
adjusting
to
India
and
Bollywood
after
being
away
for
three
decades?
Is
it
a
bit
like
your
famous
song:

Zindagi
Har
Kadam
Ek
Nayee
Jung
Hai?

I
have
returned
after
living
in
the
US
for
28
years.

The
first
thing
I
have
noticed
about
people
who
are
in
their
20s
or
30s
and
are
working
in
this
industry,
I
find
them
very
mannerless.

Mannerlessness
comes
from
disrespect.

I
don’t
take
it
personally
because
ultimately,
it
means
that
the
person
in
front
of
me
doesn’t
respect
themselves
enough
to
come
across
as
a
respectful
person.

What
do
you
attribute
that
to
—
they
don’t
know
of
your
achievements?

I
would
attribute
it
to
ignorance,
and
not
being
very
self-aware.

You
might
be
doing
a
great
job
but
it’s
not
enough
if
you
don’t
know
who
you
are
as
a
person.

Absolutely.
Looking
back,
at
what
stage
of
life
were
you
when
you
moved
to
America?

I
got
married
in
1995
and
within
two
years,
bit
by
bit,
I
finally
moved
to
the
US.

Till
then,
I
was
completing

Ghatak
and
a
new
movie,

Mil
Gayee
Manzil
Mujhe,
which
was
retitled

Do
Rahein.

I
was
also
appearing
for
the
second
year
exams
of
my
Master’s
degree
in
Ancient
Indian
Culture.

From
being
a
popular
actress
to
leading
an
anonymous
life
in
a
foreign
country,
was
there
any
trepidation?

Initially,
I
convinced
Harish
(Mysore,
her
husband)
to
move
to
India,
and
he
did.

I
didn’t
know
he
would
do
that!

I
threw
him
this
curve
ball
by
telling
him,
“I’m
good
at
Hindi
films
and
at
Indian
classical
dance
and
I
won’t
get
these
opportunities
there.
So
would
you
see
if
you
can
make
your
career
in
India?’

He
made
the
effort.
He
came
to
India
with
an
American
company,
and
was
here
for
almost
a
year.

But
it
wasn’t
working
out
very
well
for
him
because
as
an
investment
banker,
his
real
opportunities
were
in
the
US.

I
recognised
that
I
just
needed
to
get
over
my
insecurities.

Once
I
focused
on
what
I
really
wanted,
the
answer
was
clear:
I
wanted
a
family.

I
sold
all
my
properties
in
India
and
said
goodbye.

Women
can
have
it
all.
Do
you
agree?

When
I
am
asked
why
only
the
men
have
longevity
in
the
film
industry,
I
reply:
Biologically,
only
a
woman
can
bear
children.
Child
birth
and
child
nurturing
has,
over
the
centuries,
become
a
woman’s
stronghold.

But
it
is
changing.

There
are
a
few
couples
where
the
woman
wears
the
pants.

Has
your
husband
come
down
to
India
with
you
this
time?

No.

Have
you
two
worked
out
an
arrangement?

That’s
our
private
matter.

You
had
told
me
your
son
Josh
is
not
fluent
in
Hindi
but
is
toying
with
the
idea
of
giving
Bollywood
a
shot.

Josh
has
a
creative
bent
of
mind
and
is
open
to
showbiz.
But
currently,
he
has
two
more
years
before
he
graduates
from
college
in
computer
science.

Is
your
daughter
also
inclined
towards
the
arts?

Kendra
graduated
in
psychology,
but
is
working
in
finance
now.

She
is
incredibly
talented,
and
has
an
excellent
grasp
over
dancing
and
music,
but
has
zero
interest
in
persevering
with
them.

You
taught
her
to
dance?

Yes.

Did
you
also
teach
dancing
to
your
son?

No,
I
didn’t
teach
him
to
dance,
but
I
taught
him
to
be
weird
and
eccentric.

How
did
you
do
that?

Simple.
By
being
myself!

So
you
think
you’re
weird
and
eccentric?
When
we
met
at
our
common
friend’s
house,
you
asked
me,
‘Do
you
still
find
me
boring?’
And
I
said,
‘I
never
found
you
boring,
I
found
you
different.’

I
would
like
to
talk
about
one
of
our
encounters
(laughs).

We
met
for
the
first
time
at
the
outdoor
of
Subhash
Ghai’s

Hero
in
Ooty.
I
was
unwell
and
stayed
close
to
my
mom.

You
went
back
and
wrote
I
was
an
‘Ice
Maiden’
because
you
thought
that
fit
my
personality
and
attitude.

This
title
stuck
to
me
throughout
my
career.
But
now,
I
have
evolved.
America
is
a
melting
pot
and
you
become
a
different
person
after
you
assimilate
with
people
from
so
many
countries.

So
for
the
second
innings
of
my
career,
I
want
you
to
come
up
with
a
new
label.

I
will
try.
When
and
why
did
you
decide
to
embark
on
‘your
second
innings’?

I
have
been
thinking
about
it
for
more
than
a
decade.

I
was
waiting
for
Kendra
and
Josh
to
stand
on
their
own
two
feet
and
say,
‘Yes,
we
are
grown
up
adults.’

Did
you
discuss
it
with
your
family?

It
was
not
an
arbitrary
call.
I
have
the
full
support
and
encouragement
of
my
family.

What
do
your
children
think
of
their
mom
as
an
actress?
Do
they
find
your
films
retro
and
quaint?

My
children
are
very
proud
of
me,
and
of
the
fact
that
at
the
age
of
17,
I
was
a
Miss
India
and
then
one
of
the
top
actresses
in
India
for
15
years.

But
they
have
only
seen
a
few
of
my
noteworthy
films.
I
don’t
think
they
quite
understand
the
Indian
style
of
acting
in
the
’80s.

With
every
decade,
the
acting
style
evolves.
How
do
you
plan
to
stay
updated?

Firstly,
I
will
trust
my
instincts
as
an
artiste
who
understands
the
medium.

I
would
also
try
to
find
synergy
with
the
mood
and
the
tempo
of
the
present
day.

Would
you
be
comfortable
with
today’s
cussing-and-kissing
scenario?

The
audience
loved
seeing
me
doing
classical
and
semi-classical
routines.
But
I
would
love
to
do
an
item
song
today.

People
are
now
willing
to
accept
somebody
breaking
an
image.

I
say
it
from
a
place
of
confidence
that
there
is
scope
for
somebody
my
age
in
a
relevant
story
to
be
able
to
do
a
dance,
and
for
people
to
enjoy
it.

I
can’t
imagine
you
doing
a

Chikni
Chameli,
but
I
can
visualise
you
doing

Kaisi
Paheli
Zindagani
from

Parineeta.

That’s
a
wonderful
example.
Rekha
was
riveting
in
that
song.

Which
contemporary
actress
is
doing
good
work
according
to
you?

Vidya
Balan,
Tabu,
Shefali
Shah
and
Divya
Dutta
have
the
capacity
to
overcome
boundaries
and
surprise.
I
aim
to
do
the
same.

When
you
look
back
at
your
career,
have
you
surprised
yourself
and
others?

Within
three
years
of
joining
movies,
I
played
a
prostitute
in

Allahrakha.
That
came
soon
after

Hero
and
was
quite
a
surprise.

I
also
played
a
negative
role
in

Bewafai
with
Rajesh
Khanna.

Pravesh
Sippy,
who
produced

Meri
Jung,
offered
you
a
film
right
in
front
of
me.
Are
you
on
board?

Pravesh
is
keen
on
a
project,
and
would
like
to
include
me.
Let’s
see.
Whatever
he
decides.

Have
you
signed
a
film
yet?

My
trajectory
right
now
is
five
steps
forward,
two
steps
backwards
(laughs).

I
can’t
just
accept
anything
and
hope
that
it
works
out.
I
have
to
make
the
right
choices.