‘The Rejections Used To Shatter Me’

‘As
you
gain
experience,
you
realise
that
none
of
this
is
personal.’
‘The
failures
actually
teach
you
bigger
and
better
lessons.’

Like
thousands
of
aspirants
in
Mumbai,

Palak
Jaiswal
had
to
wait
for
years
before
she
got
her
first
acting
break
since
she
moved
from
her
hometown
Bhopal.

She
kept
herself
busy
in
theatre
and
commercials
before
landing
her
first
major
role
in
SonyLIV’s
well-received
show



Black,
White
&
Gray
–
Love
Kills,
in
which
she
plays
a
girl
whose
disappearance
unearths
a
shocking
murder
mystery.

“Social
media
is
your
digital
portfolio
now.
It
is
easier
for
the
people
to
find
out
about
you
and
connect.
But
ultimately,
it’s
your
talent
that
counts,”
Palak
tell

Mayur
Sanap/Rediff.

Your
character
in

Black,
White
And
Gray
is
so
twisted.
What
was
your
experience
in
playing
such
a
role?

Since
I
have
been
in
theatre,
I
can
separate
myself
from
the
character
I
am
playing.

Usually,
the
motive
is
to
bridge
the
gap
between
the
two.
That’s
where
you
find
your
character.

For
this
particular
character,
I
have
to
find
out
why
she
is
making
these
choices.
I
had
to
find
out
the
problems
she
is
dealing
with.

Were
you
comfortable
with
the
bold
scenes
in
this
show?

There
are
not
many
bold
scenes.
And
these
scenes
are
not
vulgar.

The
scenes
are
justified.

To
prepare
for
bold
scenes,
we
had
intimacy
workshops
so
that
both
actors
feel
comfortable
what
they
are
doing.
It
should
not
feel
like
you
are
doing
something
you
don’t
want
to
do.

And,
of
course,
we
were
told
about
these
scenes
beforehand.
 

The
director
and
creative
team
had
explained
how
they
are
going
shoot
it.
During
the
shoot,
we
had
an
intimacy
coordinator.

She
guided
us;
she
gave
us
a
safe
word
in
case
we
didn’t
want
to
do
anything.
Overall,
it
was
a
very
comfortable
process
both
for
me
and
my
co-star
Mayur
(More).

What
are
your
favourite
crime
thrillers?

I
am
a
big
fan
of
David
Fincher
movies.

I
love

Gone
Girl.
I
love
Amazing
Amy
as
a
character.

Somewhere,
I
was
hoping
to
play
a
character
like
that.
A
character
that’s
not
your
usual
girl,
who
is
slightly
insane.
Thankfully,
my
wish
was
fulfilled
with

Black,
White
And
Gray.

In
Hindi,
I
loved
watching

Gupt.
It
had
a
great
blend
of
crime,
suspense
and
thrill.

Where
do
you
feel
most
fulfilled
as
an
actor,
in
front
of
camera
or
live
audience?

These
are
just
mediums.

For
me,
acting
in
itself
is
a
very
fulfilling
job.

What’s
more
fulfilling
is
to
find
a
character
that
challenges
you.
To
find
different
aspects
of
your
character
is
a
very
interesting
process.

Camera
is
a
very
break
and
stop
process.
But
in
theatre,
once
you
start
there’s
no
stop.
It
keeps
on
going.

Both
are
different
mediums
and
very
enjoyable.

Do
you
enjoy
the
process
of
auditioning?

It’s
daunting.

There’s
always
some
nervousness
in
you.

You
don’t
get
a
complete
script,
so
you
enact
on
the
basis
of
a
little
information
about
that
particular
character.

Sometimes,
the
brief
that
the
casting
agents
give
is
different
from
the
director’s.

Many
times
you
lose
out
on
a
role
because
of
that.

Auditions
are
very
luck-based.

How
important
is
social
media
in
a
budding
actor’s
journey?

Social
media
plays
a
very
big
part
in
terms
of
marketing
yourself.

Actors
don’t
go
to
production
and
casting
people
with
portfolio
in
their
hands
anymore.

Social
media
is
your
digital
portfolio
now.

It
is
easier
for
the
people
to
find
out
about
you
and
connect.

But
yes,
ultimately
it’s
your
talent
that
counts.
Social
media
only
helps
you
in
creating
your
existence.

Tell
us
about
yourself.

I
come
from
Bhopal.

My
parents
are
extremely
supportive,
and
have
given
me
freedom
of
what
I
want
to
do.

My
father
brought
me
into
theatre
when
I
told
him
about
my
acting
aspirations.
He
said
if
you
want
to
learn
acting,
you
should
start
with
theatre.

I
moved
to
Mumbai
in
2008
and
did
my
schooling
here.

I
was
really
good
at
dancing
but
didn’t
want
to
get
into
dancing
professionally.

I
shifted
my
focus
to
acting,
then
started
giving
auditions.

My
professional
acting
began
in
2019
when
I
started
doing
commercials.

Was
it
difficult
to
wait
out
your
first
break?

I
always
believed
that
patience
and
hard
work
will
get
me
where
I
want
to
be.

The
most
important
thing
in
this
profession
is
perseverance
and
believing
in
yourself.

The
bigger
the
dream
the
better
it
is
because
then
you
will
work
towards
it.

The
rest
you
have
to
leave
up
to
the
universe.
Everything
has
its
own
timing.

How
do
you
deal
with
rejections?

At
first,
I
would
be
heartbroken.

The
rejections
used
to
shatter
me.
You
take
them
personally.

But
as
you
gain
experience,
you
realise
that
none
of
this
is
personal.

The
failures
actually
teach
you
bigger
and
better
lessons.

Now
I
only
focus
on
the
positive
part
of
things.